Sooooo Frustrated!!!!!

I have been feeling incredibly frustrated lately. Ever since my episode a few weeks ago I have felt very little restriction. Even with the fill I got about two weeks ago, the restriction I felt before is gone! I have another appointment on Wednesday with Dr. K for another fill. I don't know why I am not feeling as restricted as I was before. I have been really good about not eating crap but I can definately eat more than I was. My weight hasn't changed in about 3 -4 weeks now. I mean I'm happy that I haven't gained but seriously, not losing is totally stressing me out. These are the moments when I question my decision to have lapband instead of the bypass. I can't help but wonder how much weight I would have lost if I had the bypass surgery instead????

Honestly, I know that lapband surgery was the best decision for me. Even now, I don't regret it. I do tend to get caught up with my weightloss every now and again but overall feel positive about my decision. This hasn't been easy but god knows where I would be if I hadn't had surgery. I just have to remind myself to take it one day at a time. I think I'm also having a hard time not seeing people from Heart and Wellness. That program was so helpful for me. It was the one time during the week when I was truly comfortable in my own skin. I felt like I belonged and everyone accepted me for me. I have made some really great friends in the program and I'm hopeful to get together with them in the near future. I often think of the other amazing people who are either in the program now or who have graduated. They are all such inspirations to me and I wish each and every one of them a lifetime of happiness.

Well, I feel better being able to get my frustrastions out. Other than my husband Larry and a few other people, I'm not able to talk openly about how I'm feeling when it comes to my weightloss surgery. Although I think people try to understand it's almost impossible unless they have gone through a similar experience. Oh well, I'm done with my pity party. Good Night!